Nowhere was the maternal instinct of women more pronounced than when I got married to my dearest wife Gie, and lost 3 of our babies through miscarriages along the way.  Thank God, for the Lord God still blessed us with 2 children-- Osbert and Claire-Voe, who were born full terms, and delivered by Dr. Landers and the assisting nurse, through natural childbirth by Gie, who endured 12 hours of labor pains combined, without taking any epidurals. 

            I was there, and knew how difficult that was, so I never complain when I see our children closer to their Mom than me.  I know that they love me as their Dad, and not just a sperm donor, who worked two jobs in order that I could afford to send them to private preschools, middle & high schools, and the top universities of Georgetown & Northeastern, without any scholarships, and graduating with no debts; hence, I don't get jealous when they are more giving and affectionate to their Mom than Dad, because I felt the same way towards Mama & Papa.  After all, Gie carried them in her tummy, and fed them with her own blood for nine months, as their mother.

            That is why I feel sorry for being disobedient and not listening to Mama when I was in elementary, high school, and college.  Praise God! because I made it up to her and Papa by supporting them materially when I got my first teaching job, or came to the United States, until they passed on; but most especially after  Papa died, by visiting Mama in the Philippines  every year for 11 years, or lighting a candle on her grave with Papa afterwards. 

            Up to now, her memory is still vivid in my mind, like when she used to call, remind, and pray for me and my siblings in the US when she was still alive.  She even came to America with Papa, and helped us babysit Osbert and Claire-Voe before they started preschool.  She taught them how to pray, sing the alphabet, watch Geography and Animal Kingdom on TV, and to love each other all the time.

            Not only did Mama and Papa got along very well with their daughter-in-law Gie, but we also kept bribing and showering them with money and gifts, or eating and taking them out for sightseeing, and going to parties, in order to keep them in the US instead of going back to the Philippines, because they made our domestic and family life so easy for us.  By the time Gie and I got home tired from work, our children were fine, the house was clean, and dinner was ready. In return, we showed our love and appreciation to them by making sure that they're happy, and not aggravating them with any of our financial and work-related problems, because they had done enough actually by raising four children of their own, and still babysitting their two grandchildren.  In other words, they already helped us a lot, especially Mama, who never stopped praying for us while she was still alive, or already in Heaven.

            And even when Papa was mobile and strong before his first heart attack, and while enjoying his retirement with Mama in the Philippines, we never bothered them with our personal or family problems, and made sure that they were comfortable financially and happy in their home when we called them long distance on the telephone, wrote them letters or sent them birthday and Christmas cards via air mail every year, and told them about how smart and good were their grandchildren with us, namely Osbert and Claire-Voe, because it did only make them joyous and proud (particularly when Osbert brought and showed his Georgetown college diploma to Mama-- her first, while she was in her hospital bed, and two years before she died,) but it gave us satisfaction as well.

           I know that Mama & Papa will never stop loving us, the way we showed our love for them in return.  With God's help, I also was able to fulfill all my promises to Mama while she was still alive, both materially and spiritually after Papa died, instead of relying on my own siblings who have their own lives.

            As usual, Mama and Papa will always be looking down at all of their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren; and Mama will continue praying her favorite prayer, the Holy Rosary, just like what she always did according to her (and we believed her because praying was what kept her Faith in God so strong, even when she was dying,) just like after we closed the door behind us and left her for college, work, or the USA, she kept asking the intercession of our Blessed Mother Mary, who is closer to her now  in Heaven, to watch over us here on earth, because Mama Mary is no stranger to pain and suffering herself, as a devoted mother to her Son Jesus Christ.

TO BE CONTINUED...

                        

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            I never really listened to Mama when I was growing up because I knew that she would always love me no matter what.  Unlike Papa, who was the disciplinarian in the family when he was not busy earning a living for us as a travelling salesman around the country, Mama was always there for us as a homemaker for 3 boys and 1 girl, who helped her with household chores.  But being the youngest among four children, I was able to get away from it all, and sang my heart out instead at a neighbor's house who had a transistor radio and song hits magazines, because I loved to sing, or watch movies whenever Papa gave me money.

             But one time, Papa was not around, and Mama said that she didn't have any money to give me in order to go to the movies with my friends; so I took from her closet cabinet my large Buddha savings figurine full of coins, and banged it on the cement floor in front of her, breaking the ceramic into pieces, and scattering the coins all over the place.  Mama didn't say a word, looked at me straight in the eyes, and walked away. I picked up all the coins, felt ashamed of myself for doing that to her, and stayed home afterwards.

            Still, she loved me just the same, as always, especially when we moved to another province where Papa bought a furniture store, while my eldest brother and sister went to college in Manila.  She even complained to one of my Grade 6 elementary school teacher-adviser when I was not included in the Honor Roll during graduation, yet my grades were actually higher than some of those on the list, and all of my teachers said that I was an excellent student..  My teacher told her that it was because I was a new student in the school.  Fortunately, Sr. Marieta, our Religion teacher, gave me an award and gift during the Graduation Ceremonies in town as the Most Outstanding Student in Religion in the whole School District of Sta. Cruz, Zambales; and Mama stopped complaining.

            To this day, Sr. Marieta is my favorite teacher of all time because she didn't care about my one year residency, or being new in town with my parents, and having no patronages or connections, when she chose me to be inducted by Fr. Heneghan, our Irish Columban parish priest, as president, together with fellow officers and cell leaders in different schools, of the elementary division of Student Catholic Action in the whole town, because all she cared about was if you're really a good and smart kid. I liked her because she was like a very religious Mom to me, who happened to speak the same dialect and came from the same province as Mama, taught me how to serve Jesus as an altar server during Holy Mass while learning the responses in Latin, and how to pray to Jesus while kneeling in front of the Blessed Sacrament, especially when I needed help from Him.  And, I'm hoping to visit her again next year at the Benedictine Convent in Damortis, La Union, Philippines, where she retired.

            I believe that all women have the capacity to act like mothers, whether they are nuns, single or married.  And it saddens me when I read online or in the papers of women glorifying abortions, killing their babies in their wombs, or throwing them in trash cans, whether dead or alive, because based on my personal experiences, I find all women very nurturing, like the mothers that I know of, especially black women, because the first three women who helped me in getting my first job in the US, picked me up and dropped me off to church every Sunday when I was new in the country and didn't have a car, or gave me a car pool to my workplace during my first winter in America where all black women.  And, they were all mothers.

TO BE CONTINUED...